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Johnny looked so sad

Little Johnny looked so sad his teacher had to inquire what was wrong.

“What’s the problem?” she asked.

“I hope it’s not about your homework again.”

“Well, uh, yes it is,”

Little Johnny says.

“I accidentally made my homework paper into a paper aeroplane.”

“That wasn’t the smartest thing to do,” said the teacher,

“But, just this once, I’ll let you just unfold the paper and hand it in.”

“Sorry, but that won’t work,”

Little Johnny replied, looking even sadder.

“You see, the plane was hijacked!”

A little old lady goes into the store to do some shopping.
She is bewildered over the large selection of toilet paper.

“Pardon me, sir,” she says to the store manager,

” but can you explain the differences in all these toilet papers?”

“Well,” he replies pointing out one brand,

” this is as soft as a baby’s kiss. It’s $1.50 per roll.”

He grabs another and says,

“This is nice and soft as a bunny, strong but gentle, and it’s $1.00 a roll.”

Pointing to the bottom shelf he tells her,

“We call that our No Name brand, and it’s 20 cents per roll.”

“Give me the No Name,” she says.

She comes back about a week later, seeks out the manager and says,

“Hey! I’ve got a name for your No Name toilet paper. I call it John Wayne.”

“Why?” he asks.

“Because it’s rough, it’s tough and it doesn’t take crap off anybody!”