When Someone Cheats or Mistreats You, It’s About Them, Not You
Tears make you braver Heart sickness makes you wiser So thank the past for a better future. “~ Unknown
I always thought, if someone cheated on me, that I was at fault.
You know, I was convinced that something was wrong with me. I have never felt enough. I’m not even sure I can fully express that feeling, but anyway, I did not feel it enough. Pretty thin, pretty enough, smart enough, worthy or just good.
I have just seen that if someone abuses you, it has almost nothing to do with you. The behavior of others affects them.
I realized that my sexual relations with other women were related to her insecurities and that nothing wanted me to be bad enough.
It was his edition, not mine. It was his ego that needed a boost, and he used other women for that because he was neither emotional nor intellectual enough to stimulate himself.
I believe that we must be responsible enough to take care of our own feelings and not blame someone else for what we feel. He was always in a circle of conviction that he needed someone to make him happy. He had to use other women to boost his self-esteem.
Before, I felt that my world collapsed when a man deceived me or left me. I felt my value diminish when he did not want me.
I can just see my value now, it’s innate. We are all born, worthy, kind and good enough. Even if no one in the world can see it, it’s the truth. I am exactly like I am. I do not need to be other than what I am. I have nothing to prove to anyone.
I realized that I am more than adorable. If someone does not treat me the way I want and do not deserve it, it’s not a reflection of me.
I learned that my job is to take my interests into account and love myself enough to get away from anything that does not serve me or build me.
This time, I discovered inner strength much earlier than before. I left when I discovered the lies. I used to try to repair myself if I was not the only one to blame.
I realize now that I am alone. I do not need another to lock myself up.
I work and enjoy my life alone. That does not mean I do not like being in a relationship – I think it’s really great and I find it so magical that two happy people meet and share their lives.
However, I found that if the other person was looking for a person to complete or make his life more exciting than it would be, it will probably never last.
Relationships are places of spiritual growth and can foster an already happy life. Its purpose is not to improve a wretch; it’s too much power to give to a person.
Love is a place of pure and positive energy. If someone has to sleep to keep you, it’s not love. it’s control control based on a rarity model of love, and it’s not a positive energy. it’s based on fear.
I never understood when people said that love was not enough. Love is always enough, but love consists of loving acts, loving behaviors. You can not pretend to love someone, but lie to him. the two things do not match.
Here are the five things I learned from my past failure.
1. If someone deceives you or abuses you, it almost never has anything to do with you.
They are good enough, even though their actions may make you believe otherwise.
2. The bad behavior of another person does not affect you very much.
Someone who cheats on you does not make you stupid. This shows that they have problems that they have to work on.
3. Your value and value are not related to anyone or anything.
Not your weight, your relationship or your job.
4. Love is never bad. Love is amazing and easy. Fraud hurts, lies hurt, heart failure hurts, but these things are not love.
These are painful, but cheating, lying and hurting others is done out of fear and not out of love. Love is actually the only thing that makes the pain better again, and you can love yourself today. Self-love depends on you.
Set the standard for how people should love you by loving you wholeheartedly.
5. It’s not because a relationship does not work that the next one will not work
Do not give up love. Give people who made you think love wasn’t good.
“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.” ~Steve Maraboli