According to research on marital satisfaction, having children reduces happiness between spouses.
Studies indicate that during their first year of childbirth, new parents often experience unpleasant thoughts about their partners.
In addition to exhaustion and lack of sleep, why does this happen?
Women bear the grunt of housekeeping and childcare
As per studies, mothers provide more child care than fathers do, whether or not they are working mothers.
Mothers tend to face higher levels of marital dissatisfaction after having children because of additional responsibilities such as caring for the children, working and carrying out household chores. This leads them to perceive their marriages as one-sided and unfair.
Lack of s3x and intimacy
After childbirth, the s3xual life of a married couple usually hits the roof.
Women can have s3x six weeks after childbirth, but they may not be ready for penetrative s3x for up to a year. It takes time to adjust to a new body, routine, and baby.
Women who just gave birth and are still breastfeeding need time to heal. They also experience vaginal dryness due to low estrogen levels.
Overbearing mothers
Some mothers manage their spouses’ interactions with their kids because they believe they are better parents; this can cause resentment in their husbands. This practice is known as “maternal gatekeeping” by sociologists.
For childcare responsibilities to be evenly distributed, it’s necessary for mothers to allow fathers to handle tasks their way, even if it differs from their approach, as long as the child’s safety is not compromised.
How to have happier marriages
Divide the responsibilities.
Parental responsibilities and child care should be divided in a fair way.
For expample, if one partner works longer than the other, they will likely spend fewer hours on tasks relating to the home and children. However, it is more important than household chores and parental responsibilities to be split between the two of them, no matter who works more. For instance, the person who bathes the baby shouldn’t be the same person who makes breakfast.
Prioritise intimacy and not s3x
Penetrative s3x is important, but there are many other ways to be intimate with your partner if they aren’t ready for s3x after childbirth. Kissing, cuddling, holding hands, hugging, touching, fondling, and sucking are ways to establish intimacy. What are your partner’s er0genous zones or s3xual needs? Plus, are you listening to your partner’s non-s3xual needs? Do whatever it takes to keep the s3xual spark burning.
