No Response Is A Response, And It’s A Powerful One
No answer is an answer, and it’s a powerful answer
One of the most powerful things you can say to someone else is not really a word. It’s not even a gesture. It’s easy: nothing. Your silence is one of the most powerful tools at your disposal. In silence, you do not consent, you offer nothing and you set the standard of control in your direction.
No answer is actually a pretty strong answer.
If you have had a stormy conversation or a real fight and there is no clear solution, you can create your own door and cross it. All you need is silence, the decision to say nothing else. Leave him alone and leave.
The other person may want to continue. They can say hurtful things, they do not want to imprison you again. But you lose all your strength when you do not react to benefits in kind and you simply do not react. A fight requires two people. It is enough to lay down the arms, in this case their words, to finish.
Know when to stop.
Do not mistake yourself. Communication is important, even when she gets angry. I do not suggest that you face a difficult conversation. What I’m saying is that you should be able to know when to stop. Knowing when to stop is crucial. If a debate is going on, there is no progress and you are ready to talk from one day to the next. Stop committing yourself.
Of course, fighting is not the only situation where your silence is powerful. Sometimes your silence is important to “play cool”.
One text, two texts, no answer? …
I have a rule. If I’ve met someone I really like and we’re talking or even making an appointment, if I send two text messages without getting an answer, I shut them up and continue. I know the excuse. Two weeks later, you receive a message saying, “I’m really sorry, I was very busy.” I do not believe it at all. No one is so busy that he can not stop and send an answer, even if it says, “Sorry, I’m super busy.”
Even if this excuse text arrives two weeks later, I will treat my silence. I am not accessible to anyone. Your apologies are heard and if you want to try again, do not hesitate.
But sometimes, just keep going.
For some people, your constant silence is all they deserve and it sends a strong message: what you intend to do does not work for me and no amount of exchanged words will change that fact. Their actions, however, could.
Attack me if you changed your behavior.
Until there …