Narcissists Deny Flaws In Themselves And Put The Blame On Others
5 Ways Narcissists Project and Attack You
Narcissistic self-esteem and self-esteem depend on how others perceive it, as most of them generally lack self-esteem.
They tend to deny their mistakes and blame others for their faults, misfortunes and personal mistakes. There is even a word for this mess: it’s called projection. People with narcissistic tendencies are highly solicited individuals.
In what follows, we examine five different ways in which sociopathic and psychopathic narcissists project, accuse, deny, confuse and injure those around them.
1. They blame others for their own benefit
When they ask for their own conscience, they really want to argue with you to better hide what they do not want you to know. And since it’s never their fault, they have another way to blame. It is a therapeutic relief for a collective group of narcissists to always ask and receive a public apology.
In addition, gas light is a well-known method of distorting reality to make others doubtful so that they can run their own programs. As defined in Wikipedia: “Gas lighting or gas lighting is a form of mental abuse in which information is twisted, omitted selectively to favor the abuser, or false information presented to victims in their own memory, their perception dubious to leave and reason. ”
2. They play the victims
Playing the victim is a common narcissistic strategy. Instead of working in-house or face-to-face with the other person, they have no problem attracting others by lying and describing you as an author and yourself as a victim.
This usually involves a preemptive strike or provocation to get a reaction. For example, slandering, destroying your property, turning others against you, or physically attacking you. And once you have responded adequately to their active or passive aggression, they will say that you are the abuser because you have hurt them or are unreasonable because of your “unacceptable behavior towards an animal”.
It is devious and calculated and also includes the charge of doing things yourself. It is therefore not surprising that the public of such a drama does not see the situation as a whole or is not interested in knowing the whole story. Many of them could even take the side of the narcissist. The narcissist does her best to believe her show in order to manage her emotions, so much so that she will do almost anything and say.
For them, it is rarely a question of truth and almost always of perception of their public.
In this way, they receive the false assertion that they are just and good and that you are wrong and wrong. Her self-esteem can now be restored and her feelings of inadequacy and shame are under control. So everything is fine and good. Outside of those at the reception, but who cares?
This method is often used in highly conflictual family situations where a member of the narcissistic family is involved, but it can also occur in other social contexts outside the home environment. Triangulation means an increase in tension between family members, since a person selectively communicates or does not communicate the truth completely and in a misleading way, and creates another version of the story in a way that creates tensions between the other members.
For narcissists, the goal is often to find a scapegoat.
They should normally find an easily manipulable partner they can control, or someone who can defend them, and / or they can blame themselves when things get complicated.
However, you can only deceive someone who wants to deceive you. They can not hide and are always discovered sooner or later.
Their stories are usually not consistent and many relevant information is often missing. Often, they are unable to notice their own blind spots, and it is largely the responsibility of the facilitator to let them go or not recognize them when they know exactly what is going on.
4. They call you things you are not
A good example is that you are accused of having cheated if you do not do it behind your back.
It can also be something in the sense that one thinks only of oneself and that one is selfish because one does not do what I ask you. At the same time, it is those who manage to never stop looking for excuses, who do not respect their promises, who are not reliable, who think only of their own needs or who are competing with you. In addition, they easily forget everything you have done for them.
In their opinion, they are entitled to all your resources. They attack you if you can not give them what they want. They will try to use various abusive and manipulative tactics, such as taunts, imputation, intimidation, triangulation, tarnishing, obscuring the problem, fires of gas, provocation, guilt, criticism or agitation to make you feel bad and give in to their demands.
If it’s not for you, it’s for someone else. “Look, what horror this person is! And do you know what they did?” Forget me. Let’s find someone with mistakes and talk about it. In this way, “we do not have to think about my shortcomings, or we will come to the conclusion that I am awesome by default because someone else is terrible.”
5. Their life expectancy is unrealistic
Under the appearance of the narcissist, lay layers and layers of false illusions that they have created over the years.
Because of their false sense of proportion, overcompensation, unrealistic expectations, and demands become an integral part of their life equation. They then cultivate the image of a man overgrown, a baby or a princess who thinks that the world owes them everything while they dress with a superior appearance.
The self-perceived notions of big roles or the creation of a sort of “fantasy of life” add to their many layers of false lies. The religiosity for one is often used as an escape or blanket, while associations with words like perfect family, man / woman of my dreams, life buoy, prince charming and other ways to achieve some sort of ” solution “could also be a symptom.
Accepting reality is a struggle for them because they can not relate to a process, but only to see the desired result. If you try to explain to them what is really going on, they will see you as someone who apologizes. No matter what you do, it’s never enough for them, and as hard as you try, you can not win because they can not see or recognize the so-called “little things” that happen behind the scenes .
They will do everything to not accept the reality and become a worthy person – and yet they can act convincingly.
Have you ever experienced some of these things when dealing with narcissists?
If you notice something that is not in the list, you can let us know in the comments section.