Little Johnny was sitting at the kitchen table one morning, quietly eating his breakfast. He watched his parents for a few minutes, got lost in his thoughts, and suddenly turned to his mother with a burning question.
“Mommy,” Johnny asked, “why does Daddy have so little hair on his head?”
His mother smiled, feeling quite pleased with herself for coming up with a quick, flattering excuse for her husband’s receding hairline. “Well, dear, that’s because he thinks a lot. Smart men always think a lot!”
Johnny stared at his mother’s thick, voluminous hair for a long, quiet moment, nodded processing the information, and then asked:
“Then why do you have so much hair?”
An Arrogant Professor Tried Everything to Fail His Witty Student—Until the Ultimate Insult Backfired
A university student walked into the campus cafeteria and tried to sit down next to one of his professors for lunch.
The professor, known for his supreme arrogance, looked down his nose at the young man and sneered, “You know, a majestic swan would never willingly be friends with a dirty pig.”
The student didn’t miss a beat. He smiled warmly, picked up his tray, and replied, “In that case, sir, I shall fly on.”
Humiliated by the cheeky response, the furious professor vowed to do everything in his power to fail the student on his upcoming oral examination.
When exam day arrived, the professor threw the hardest, most convoluted questions at the student. To his absolute frustration, the student had brilliant, flawless answers for every single one. Desperate to trap him, the professor decided to ask one final trick question.
“Imagine you are walking down a deserted road and you find two bags,” the professor said slyly. “One bag contains absolute cleverness, and the other contains pure gold. Which bag do you choose?”
“The gold, obviously,” the student answered without hesitating.
The professor smirked. “Well, unfortunately, I have to disagree. I would choose cleverness, because intellect is far more important than mere money.”
The student shrugged and smiled. “Everyone chooses what they don’t have.”
The professor turned bright red. He was so utterly consumed with rage that he grabbed his pen, furiously scribbled the word “ASS” across the top of the student’s exam paper, and shoved it back into his hands.
The student took the paper and walked out of the classroom without looking at it. However, a couple of minutes later, the door creaked open. The student walked back inside, politely handed the paper back to the stunned professor, and said:
“Excuse me, sir. You signed my paper, but you forgot to give me my grade!”
