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Johnny Was Playing Outside

What Follows Next Will Make You Laugh Crazy.

One day little Johnny was playing outside.

As he was feeling particularly reckless, Johnny kicked a beehive.

The honeybees cam out of the hive and started swirling around Johnny.

This pissed Johnny off so he stomped on the bees.

His father witnessed this and told him:

“Don’t do that! No honey for a month as a punishment for stomping on the bees.”

Later that week, Johnny squished a butterfly as it landed on his nose.

His father saw this and said:

“No Johnny! No butter for a month will be your punishment .”

While Johnny’s mother was cooking dinner later that day, a few cockroaches were crawling on the counter. Johnny’s mother quickly crushed the cockroaches with a frying pan.

Johnny and his father was watching.

Johnny asked his father:

“Are you going to tell her or should I?”

Little Johnny likes to gamble.

One day, his dad gets a new job, so his family has to move to a new city.

Johnny’s dad thinks,

“I’ll get a head start on Johnny’s gambling.”

He calls the teacher and says,

“My son Johnny will be starting your class tomorrow, but he likes to gamble, so you’ll have to keep an eye on him.”

The teacher says, “Okay,” because she can handle it.

The next day, Johnny walks into class and hands the teacher an apple and says,

“Hi, my name is Johnny.”

She says, “Yes, I know who you are.”

Johnny smiles and says,

“I bet you $10 you’ve got a mole on your b*tt.”

The teacher thinks that she will break his little gambling problem, so she takes him up on the bet.

She pulls her pants down, shows him her b*tt, and there is no mole.

That afternoon, Johnny goes home and tells his dad that he lost $10 to the teacher and explains why.

His dad calls the teacher and says,

“Johnny said that he bet you that you had a mole on your b*tt and he lost.”

The teacher says,

“Yeah, and I think I broke his gambling problem.”

Johnny’s dad laughs and says,

“No you didn’t, he bet me $100 this morning that he’d see your a$s before the day was over.”