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I thought my boyfriend was ‘perfect’ until I looked through his phone – now I’m so glad I did

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A woman was stunned when she went through her ‘perfect’ boyfriend’s phone while he was sleeping – only to find thousands of messages insulting her and degrading their sᴇx ʟɪғᴇ.

Lily*, from the US, thought she had the ‘healthiest relationship ever’ with a man who was ‘loving’ and ‘caring’ – and she expected to spend her life with him.

But a gut feeling woke her up in the middle of the night and made her secretly look up her name in his phone.

Lily was met with ‘foul’ texts between her boyfriend and his friends where he m0cked her b0dy, claimed he ‘hated’ their sᴇx ʟɪғᴇ, and revealed that he ‘couldn’t stand her in public’.

‘Him and his friends spent hours making fun of what I said, degrading, and embarrassing me,’ Lily shared through tears. ‘Every insecurity I had was laid out into his group chats and made into a punchline.’

She shared her story online in a now-deleted post.

“I don’t allow looking through phones; I think it’s wrong and an invasion of privacy. I had no reason to look at his phone, but what I found shocked me to my core.

‘He called my ᴘʀɪᴠᴀᴛᴇ ᴘᴀʀᴛs ‘weird’, said he hated the things I did in bed and made mean jokes, saying things like, ‘It would be warm, but not if Lily does it’ or ‘ It’s hot for a moment, but then this b!tch opens her damn mouth.”

Lily also shared that she was openly ᴘᴀɴsᴇxᴜᴀʟ and worked with many LGBTQ+ nonprofits, which led to her boyfriend calling her the “f-slur.”

‘He had endless conversations about how he ‘can’t f**king stand me’, that ‘I am so f**king lame’. He said I never add anything to conversations and that he’s only with me for the sᴇx,’ she wrote.

She revealed that most of her boyfriend’s energy went into describing how much he hated her and wanted to break up with her.

‘Everything was so misogynistic and homophobic, and he said women should never be in charge of anything because we’re the reason the world was going to crap.’

Lily was exposed to ‘dirty’ texts between her boyfriend and his friends in which he ᴍᴏᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʜᴇʀ ʙᴏᴅʏ, claimed he ‘hated’ their sᴇx ʟɪғᴇ and revealed he ‘couldn’t stand her in public’.

Lily felt lost and confused because the man in the messages bore no resemblance to the kind boyfriend she had come to know and love.

‘I felt like I was reading the messages of a stranger, not my loving and supportive boyfriend. He supported me endlessly, said how much he loved talking about the things I was passionate about. I thought we shared the same values.

‘We never fought, spent all our time together, he went out of his way for me all the time. He made an effort to get to know my friends, any time I had issues in our relationship, we’d chat about it and he’d step up in the perfect way.’

She revealed that she had never seen anyone with such a split personality.

‘I broke up with him straight away, he tried to explain it away but I couldn’t listen to him. It was one of the weirdest breakups ever, I feel so sick.”

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Thousands were equally appalled by the Jekyll and Hyde situation.

‘I could never stay with someone who would make me out to be so terrible in front of his friends for validation. So humiliating and honestly unforgivable,’ a woman said.

‘Psychopath and narcissist. Top tier level lying and manipulation,’ another wrote. ‘Someone who idolises being that type of person or fitting in with those kind of people is truly disturbed.’

A third said, ‘I’m sorry you’re going through this, a good man would not be sharing any information about your intimate life let alone saying disgusting things about you. I hope you realise you didn’t know the real him and don’t mourn losing him.’

*Names have been changed for privacy reasons.