A mother was teaching her young son about the dangers of alcohol.
She filled one glass with water and another with whiskey.
“Now watch carefully,” she said proudly.
First, she dropped a worm into the water.
The worm swam around happily.
Then she dropped another worm into the whiskey.
Within seconds, the worm curled up and d*ed.
The mother crossed her arms confidently and asked,
“So… what did you learn from this experiment?”
The little boy thought for a moment, then smiled and said:
“If I drink whiskey, I won’t get worms!”
The mother stood there in complete silence.
The science lesson ended immediately. 😭
Read more…
A man is driving his five-year-old son to school for his first day.
Suddenly the boy shouts out,
“Daddy! Daddy! Look at those moo moo cows in that field.”
His father says, “Hang on, you’re a big boy now, you must use adult names. It’s a cow, not a moo moo cow.”
The boy is quiet for a while then suddenly shouts out,
“Daddy! Daddy! Look at those baah baah lambs in that field.”
“I’ve told you” the father replies.
“You’re a big boy now, you must use the adult names. It’s a lamb not a baah baah lamb.”
He drops the boy off at school and returns later to take him home.
“How did your first day go, son?” he asked.
“What did you do?”
“We did some sums and we all read a story,” he replied.
“Oh,” said his father.
“What was the story called?”
The little boy puffed his chest out and replied proudly,
“Winnie the Sh*t!”
