He Used The Priest’s Own Logic 😂
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, “I almost had an affair with another woman. “
The priest said, “What do you mean, almost? “
The Irishman said, “Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped. “
The priest said, “R*bbing together is the same as p*tt*ng it in. You’re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box.
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave.
The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, “I saw that. You didn’t put any money in the poor box!“
The Irishman replied, “Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that’s the same as putting it in!”
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A professor stood before his class of 20 senior organic biology students, about to hand out the final exam.
“I want to say that it’s been a pleasure teaching you this semester. I know you have all worked extremely hard and many of you are off to medical school after summer. So that no one gets their GP messed up because they might have been celebrating a bit too much this week, anyone who would like to opt out of the final exam today will receive a “B” for the course.”
There was much rejoicing amongst the class as students got up, passed by the professor to thank him and sign out on his offer.
As the last taker left the room, the professor looked out over the handful of remaining students and asked,
“Anyone else? This is your last chance.”
One final student rose up and took the offer.
The professor closed the door and took attendance of those students remaining.
“I’m glad to see you believe in yourself,” he said. “Each of you gets an A.”
